Affirmations – Negative and Positive

THE STUFF WE TELL OURSELVES – 

CREATIVE, OBSERVATIONAL, OR WHAT?

 

Have you ever repeated “negative affirmations” like these (to yourself or out loud)?

I don’t deserve to succeed.

The world is against me.

Miracles don’t happen, I never get a break.

I am conflicted about most everything, I can’t make any decisions.

I am a disappointment.

I lead a life of self-deception and sheer stupidity.

I cannot be happy. Ever.

I have absolutely no love in my life. None.

I must play the part of a tragic figure.

I must act sad and moody most all of the time.

I am never really good enough.

My timing is pathetically awful.

Most anything makes me angry, then I feel guilty, then I feel ashamed, then I feel angrier.

Let’s stop right here. Do these words help to create negative conditions, or are they simply a sad commentary on what is?  These examples are meant to be somewhat irrational, absolutist, all-or-nothing assumptions, ’cause that’s how we sometimes (or all too often) think.

It’s true that words have power and that thoughts trigger feelings.  Obviously, some emotions can be motivating … and others make us want to get back to bed, pull the covers over our heads, and have a personal (possibly perpetual) pity-party (not pretty)!

Our thoughts … the words we tell ourselves … might or might not be true or helpful. Yet, often by habit, we have been known to focus our thinking on negative, false, (definitely not helpful) words —negative affirmations, so to speak.

Do negative affirmations work as well as positive ones? Or, perhaps a better question is: do affirmations “work” at all?

How did you feel when you read the set of negative affirmations? Read the next bunch slowly and carefully, savor the phrases, and notice the effect.

I can make my choices based on the outcomes I most desire.

I am loved and appreciated.

I value and appreciate my life.

I have tremendous potential.

I am allowed to pursue my best goals.

I can find out whatever I need to know.

I am fortunate, thankful, grateful.

I am perpetually inspired.

I’m open and receptive to miracles in my life.

I deserve to succeed. I am allowed to succeed.

I can make the choices that make me happy.

I can do what I love.

I have great timing (after all, I AM reading this!)

——————————————————–

For me, some kind of affirmation practice is useful in managing thoughts, and the results that follow. Importantly, they have to be worded in such a way that we can accept them as statements of truth.  I think an “affirmation” that is clearly bogus (inflated, unrealistic, irrational, inappropriate) is more like wishful thinking than a practical tool. Nonetheless, sometimes miracles DO happen, and working with positive affirmations could be a catalyst.

What do you think?

The Grati-Tools

Practicing the Practical Power of Gratitude

(This is a repeat of earlier material … but you can’t have enough gratitude, I think!)

Intentional gratitude practices – “Grati-Tools”
* to experience more of the positive feelings, moods, emotions associated with gratitude.
* to encourage sincere expressions of gratitude, appreciation, thankfulness.
* to gain new perspectives that could create or catalyze improvements in multiple areas of life.
• to literally increase happiness and well-being; short and long term.

Grati-Tool #1: Gratitude For Those Who Touched My Life
List ten people (or animal companions) from your past or present, who have positively contributed to your life. Those you love, who’ve helped you in some way, mentors, teachers … those who deserve your thanks and appreciation. Once a week, read your list and add ten more names. Think about what you would write to them in a thank-you note. And, maybe … write that note!

Grati-Tool #2: The Gratitude Walk
Take a walk (short or long), and notice all the things that you could conceivably be grateful for.
Such as: life itself, pavement, electricity, trees, traffic lights, cars, sky, eyesight … the things that work.
Consider how your life, and everything in it, might be seen as gifts.

Grati-Tool #3: Liberally and Sincerely EXPRESS Appreciation To Those Who Surely Deserve It
• Say “thank you,” “I appreciate you and what you did,” “good job!” … etc.
• Tell the people you love that you love them.
• Send thank-you notes. • Pay a gratitude visit.

Grati-Tool #4: Observe “Grati-Tuesdays”
Just for fun, make Tuesday the day of the week when you particularly focus on gratitude practice(s).
Or … “Thank You Thursdays” — the day you especially express gratitude to others.

Grati-Tool #5: The Gratitude Journal (a.k.a. “Gratitude Diary” … “Gratitude List”)
Once a day, or even once a week, write down things, people, relationships, circumstances, feelings, abilities, talents, blessings, etc. that you feel grateful for. Three, four, five or more. Be specific.
Even better: also write why!

Grati-Tool #6: Happy Birthday – Grateful For Another Year!
Make a gratitude list on your birthday, with one item for each year of your life.

Grati-Tool #7: Take a Gratitude Break
Close your eyes … relax … and for one minute, focus your attention on a person, thing, circumstance, situation, accomplishment, talent, ability, etc. that you’re truly and deeply grateful for. If you can, imagine/visualize him … her … it. If your mind wanders, just bring it back. FEEL the gratitude and happiness as you focus your attention. Making a mental movie, or creating a mental collage – also fine! Do it once a day, or when you feel stressed or petty!

©2015 Jerry D. Posner  • http://www.jerryposner.com •  You can’t lose … with gratitude!

Start Your Day in a Positive Way!

Spend a minute or two on each, “filling in the blanks”
That means, more than one answer for each statement.

I deeply care about ____________________.
I am grateful for ______________________.
I am inspired by ______________________.

Doing this mentally will be effective for some.
Writing or typing your answers will be effective for most!
Try it for 30 days straight, and see what changes!

Ways to Make 2015, Your Best Year! — Lecture Notes

Ways to Make 2015, Your Best Year! – Lecture Notes

We start with who we are, where we are, what we have to work with … NOW!

Attitude, perspective, point-of-view might be just as important as the “things
that happen.”

What might be some elements of ‘your best year?’

What is important, meaningful to you now?

What would you like to change … improve … accomplish?

How would you like to feel?

What ignites your passion?

What triggers your happiness and joy?

Focus on the things that you CAN control or manage.                                                                                Choices, attitudes, actions, behaviors, etc.

Seek the appropriate balance between PLEASURE and PURPOSE.

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to
choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” — Dr. Viktor Frankl

So … MIND THE GAP!

Emotions are contagious!

You can catch them, and others can catch them from you!
So, it pays to manage emotions, to know what you’re feeling and your emotional targets.

Make a “To-Feel List” — List of feelings or emotional states you want more often. Review regularly.
For example: happy, joyful, proud, enthusiastic, confident, grateful,
compassionate, smart, lucky, appreciative, creative, energetic, professional,
calm, hopeful, positive, serene, helpful, loved, valued.

Three other very helpful lists:
• To-Do List (of course!) – Today’s Mission
• Gratitude Journal
• Inspiration List

Choose a few key words/short phrases – THEMES – to influence attitude, mood, behavior, choices.
Some examples: Listen. Love more. Compassion. Kindness. Calm. Gratitude.
Grace. Faith. Flow. Patience. Acceptance. Balance. Forgiveness. Resilience. Rational.
Honesty. Mindfulness. Ambition. Courage. Laugh more. Eat healthy. Optimism. Serenity. Exercise. Meditate. Peace. Walk, don’t jump, to conclusions. Confidence.  Joy.  Service.

To achieve specific goals: Break them down into small, workable steps.

“What will I do TODAY?”
“PRACTICE MAKES HABITS” – to create a new habit, link it to an existing one.

These “R’s” could help!
Recognize (what you need to do, think, feel. Having a practical plan is smart)
Remember (write down the goal and your action plan. Read it daily)
Reinforce (with action … practice … repetition … reward yourself)
Review (observe results and feedback … modify your plan as needed or desired)
Repeat (the stuff that works best for you)

“Do something. If it works, do more of it. If it doesn’t, do something else.”
— Franklin D. Roosevelt

15 For 2015 — Daily Reminders for a Stellar Year

15 For 2015
Daily Reminders for a Stellar Year
By Jerry Posner

1.   Sometimes a single act of kindness changes everything.
2.   Appreciate and treasure each moment … especially this one.
3.   Need courage? Recall inspirational people and their deeds.
4.   Preparation reduces fear and shrinks worry.
5.   Angry? Count to twenty, slowly. Still angry? Do it again.
6.   Expect miracles.
(If that doesn’t work, notice the ones that already exist.)
7.   Gratitude: feel it, express it, promote it. Be a grati-tutor!
8.   More facts = better beliefs.
9.   Message from your Future-Self: love more, kvetch less.
10. If it’s too difficult to forgive and forget, just choose one.
11.  Put on your (rational) thinking cap … and leave it on.
12. Courtesy is fundamental, indifference is the enemy.
13. Choose your attitude; many fine options available now.
14. Positive expectations just might skew the odds in your favor.
15. What we do, and how we do it, always matters.

“Since there’s always a choice … choose wisely!”

A Very Generous Testimonial Re: My Life-Management Coaching

I first met Jerry at Canyon Ranch for his “Gratitude” presentation, and from that first hour in his presence, I knew he was someone who had the potential to be an impactful mentor and help me finally change my outlook on life. What I didn’t know at that time was how profound the experience would be, and how my husband would also decide to work with him, and in the end, how meaningful Jerry’s insights would be in our future together as a married couple.

What Jerry helped my husband with most, is realizing that he (we all) has the power to change his life by the choices he makes each and every day…. from the very small and mundane to the large and complicated.

I also found that Jerry’s way of coaching made what seemed like Mt. Everest-type obstacles in the past, start to seem like something that was clear, manageable and something I felt comfortable navigating. Taking true accountability was something Jerry taught me. He helped us start learning how to respond to each situation life hands us with compassion and intention. After 4-5 sessions with Jerry (which is generally a short time if comparing to a therapist), our lives have already drastically changed by changing our choices. In our house we now say “What Would Jerry Do?!”

Important Note: This IS a process… I’d like to say he is a “magician” but the tools he gives you must be used and practiced in order to get the desired results.

Jerry’s pearls of wisdom are like an angel on your shoulder in the toughest of times.

He redefines the word coach because there’s not just instruction, there is inspiration. He has given us the tools/resources and perspective to choose to create the best life we can for ourselves. We finished our sessions with Jerry feeling energized, informed, and ready to conquer whatever life has to throw at us. We are stronger as a couple more than ever, and it has connected us on a whole new level.

Intentional Gratitude Practices – Thanksgiving 2014

Practicing the Practical Power of Gratitude

Thanksgiving, 2014

Intentional gratitude practices – “Grati-Tools”
* to experience more of the positive feelings, moods, emotions associated with gratitude.
* to encourage sincere expressions of gratitude, appreciation, thankfulness.
* to gain new perspectives that could create or catalyze improvements in multiple areas of life.
* to literally increase happiness and well-being; short and long term.

Grati-Tool #1:  Gratitude For Those Who Touched My Life
List ten people (or animal companions) from your past or present, who have positively contributed to your life. Those you love, who’ve helped you in some way, mentors, teachers … those who deserve your thanks and appreciation. Once a week, read your list and add ten more names.  Think about what you would write to them in a thank-you note.  And, maybe … write that note!

Grati-Tool #2:  The Gratitude Walk
Take a walk (short or long), and notice all the things that you could conceivably be grateful for.
Such as:  life itself, pavement, electricity, trees, traffic lights, cars, sky, eyesight … the things that work.

Consider how your life, and everything in it, might be seen as gifts.

Grati-Tool #3:  Liberally and Sincerely EXPRESS Appreciation To Those Who Surely Deserve It
•  Say “thank you,” “I appreciate you and what you did,” “good job!” … etc.
•  Tell the people you love that you love them.
•  Send thank-you notes.  •  Pay a gratitude visit.

Grati-Tool #4:  Observe “Grati-Tuesdays”
Just for fun, make Tuesday the day of the week when you particularly focus on gratitude practice(s).

Or … “Thank You Thursdays” — the day you especially express gratitude to others.

Grati-Tool #5:  The Gratitude Journal (a.k.a. “Gratitude Diary” … “Gratitude List”)
Once a day, or even once a week, write down things, people, relationships, circumstances, feelings, abilities, talents, blessings, etc. that you feel grateful for. Three, four, five or more.  Be specific.

Even better: also write why!

Grati-Tool #6:  Happy Birthday – Grateful For Another Year!
Make a gratitude list on your birthday, with one item for each year of your life.

Grati-Tool #7:  Take a Gratitude Break
Close your eyes … relax … and for one minute, focus your attention on a person, thing, circumstance, situation, accomplishment, talent, ability, etc. that you’re truly and deeply grateful for.  If you can, imagine/visualize him … her … it.  If your mind wanders, just bring it back. FEEL the gratitude and happiness as you focus your attention.  Making a mental movie, or creating a mental collage – also fine!  Do it once a day, or when you feel stressed or petty!

©2014 Jerry D. Posner  •  posgroup@aol.com  •  http://www.jerryposner.com

You can’t lose … with gratitude!

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 2,307 other followers